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OH, Fomo

April 15, 2018

FOMO, for those of you like me who never know what acronyms stand for these days it means: Fear Of Missing Out. Ohhhh boy. This to me is such an LA acronym that practically sums up the majority of the city, but fomo happens every where at any time to any individual! With it being weekend one of Coachella (which is the weekend LITERALLY everyone and their mothers go) leads to a time of extreme fomo for some, so I think it’s appropriate to talk about my issue with this epidemic. *The photos above are basically telling a short story of me getting a bit of fomo but then realizing I can’t find find a fuck to give!

Here’s the main problem I have with “fomo”… It usually tends to lead to someone taking it waaaayy too personally that they weren’t invited. I get that we get a little bit of validation and a glimmer of significance when we’re constantly invited to things but why do we put such an expectation on our friends to ALWAYS invite us? It’s almost extremely egotistical and I think it’s border line unhealthy.

I have a friend group that is almost impossible to hang out with without the ENTIRE group being present. For example, if I want a friend or two to come over to watch a movie, one of the friends who I didn’t invite (for NO specific or malicious reason) will throw a fit. Sometimes I forget to invite someone, or it slips my mind OR I just don’t necessarily feel like hanging out with them and that should be okay! In the book The Four Agreements, (READ IT.) Don Miguel Ruiz stresses the importance to not take things personally. When we take not being invited personally it shifts the dynamic of a friendship and quite possibly lead to the person just inviting you because they know the shit storm that’ll come with them not inviting you, and you don’t want to be a obligated/pity invite, do you?!

Maybe I’m just a very laid back person that doesn’t take things too seriously… Don’t get me wrong, I over analyze everything always, but I don’t think it’s healthy to think so highly of ourselves to be invited to everything and take offense when we aren’t. There are things that obviously give you a right to be angry or hurt when it comes to not being invited, but I’m speaking in a more general theme of small casualties that don’t need to turn into a big deal. There are already so many things to be worried about given our current world wide issues, don’t let not getting invited to a party stress you out even more. Priorities people!!!

Also, sometimes it’s smart to dive inward and actually think about why you’re angry. It might teach you a little more of who you are, where your insecurities lie and what you expect from others! Rather than lashing out, take a moment to understand why you feel the way you feel, and if need be, communicate that to whoever can fix the problem.

Some of the best moments of your lifetime will be moments you spend alone, learning the things about yourself that make you YOU, so if and when fomo hits you next, then just know those people won’t be around your amazingness and that’s a bigger loss for them than it is for you. Think about it. 😉

  • Reply
    Ken
    April 15, 2018 at 11:04 am

    What is your career apart from this “blog”? Do you pay your own bills/ rent like other kids your age? What exactly is your talent?

    • Reply
      Aimee
      April 15, 2018 at 1:28 pm

      Go somewere ? Bullying isn’t right Stella does a lot of work on the side that you don’t even know about she’s very talented she’s amazing she’s done the clothing line she’s done modeling acting and more and now blog just be happy and respect her I don’t like to see the negativity comments too hard yes she’s nothing like Vanessa but that’s what keeps them going they’re both very strong women and head strong and talented and they do things separately not everybody is going to act and dance sing like there sibling everybody has their own unique talent in their own ways so boy bye you dont even know what sellas is capable of

    • Reply
      Chris CLASS
      April 17, 2018 at 2:55 pm

      And you , what is exactly your talent , except barking after Stella ? 😂😂😂

    • Reply
      Effu
      April 23, 2018 at 3:13 pm

      She is obviously more successful than you, so yes she does pay her own bills. What exactly do you do Ken? What is your talent? Is it spending your time reading Stella’s blog and hating on it? Do you work a 9-5? Are you a dunkin donuts employee? You must really hate your life and are so jealous of Stella. Well in the end, you will remain on the bottom and she will always be higher on the social and economic class. 🙂 have a nice day ken, hope you get out of your depression!

  • Reply
    Linzi
    April 15, 2018 at 11:36 am

    Loving the blogs as always ❤

  • Reply
    Aimee
    April 15, 2018 at 1:24 pm

    That right dont give a fuck you know what do you if your friends cant handle you then maybe there not your friend people are over sensitive and I had fomo moments alot as but did i really miss out on partying geting getting pregnant young having drugs and stuff no I didn’t I’m proud to say that I stayed home and did nothing and I’m perfectly healthy and fun I’ve not done anything crazy like that so like I only started drinking as I got older live with no regrets

  • Reply
    Tess
    April 15, 2018 at 4:43 pm

    Ugh, loving your advice and blog as always!! You kind of remind me of me lol…. this blog has been very inspirational! Thanks Stella ^.^

  • Reply
    V
    April 15, 2018 at 5:58 pm

    “Also, sometimes it’s smart to dive inward and actually think about why you’re angry. It might teach you a little more of who you are.” aaaa THIS speaks sm volumes to me!! I do wish some of my friends didn’t take offence when I make spontaneous plans w/ some people in our group. But you can’t really change a person can ya?? I’m honestly like you in the sense that if I’m not invited, I don’t mind at all! <3

  • Reply
    John Christy
    April 15, 2018 at 11:24 pm

    Love it, Stella! I wish I could think of all the interesting things that you do. I loved your letter to yourself the other day! SHtalk is amazing too! Lots of love xo

  • Reply
    BRUCE
    April 16, 2018 at 4:41 am

    Whatever makes a person “happy” but you also RISK to END your RELATIONSHIP with that person forever. You might as well just say bye,bye.

  • Reply
    Aiko Cunanan
    April 17, 2018 at 5:32 am

    Not going to lie, FOMO is the worst! But you’re right- some of the best moments are spent alone. I value alone time so much and feel like I have more peace of mind that way! Great post and awesome tips. Thanks for sharing <3 (P.S. nice meeting you at the event last week) have a great Tuesday!

    Sincerely,

    Aiko
    http://aikocunanan.com/

  • Reply
    Chris CLASS
    April 17, 2018 at 2:51 pm

    Hi my favorite little Baby – Stella ! I miss your monday – SHtalk – podcast with Baby – Sammi … Why did you stop it ??? 😩😧😢 😭😭😭 Mood : sad …

  • Reply
    i fap a lot
    April 22, 2018 at 9:38 am

    Stella, i would give anything to just sniff your butthole.

  • Reply
    nadiamsakni
    April 23, 2018 at 2:40 pm

    I feel like this blog is a really safe/girly place where I can come and just fill my brain with goodness!! I’ve loved you and vanessa for as long as i can remember so it’s all super special/inspiring to me. I LOVE YOU BOO. xx

  • Reply
    Pregnant lady FOMO is a real thing, but it doesn't have to be so bad!
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  • Reply
    NoMo FOMO – city & sass
    May 6, 2018 at 2:03 pm

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